Opinions Would Be Appreciated

[Shredmonster]

So I am attached and living a vanilla lifestyle. But for the last 10 years I have wanted to visit a pro domme which I did last weekend.

I just wanted to go once and probably will leave it at that. But I would appreciate opinions from any of the dominant ladies here please.

We really hit it off. She was intelligent and beautiful. We just "fit" if you know what I mean - looks, smell, attitude, everything. It was the perfect session. I happen to be a very attractive guy in top shape, educated, etc... But pretty much a nice normal guy compared to what she must deal with usually I would guess. We have emailed back and forth and I told her I probably would not be back since I was in a relationship (I know I know) and just wanted to do this once. We have emailed back and forth every day for about 4 days.

She requested that I send her pics of the marks. I emailed her the next day after the session. Also, I told her the reasons I would probably not come back was that my curisoity was settled, I was in a relationship and that if I saw here again that I would start becoming emotionally bonded.

She thanked me for being honest and said a lot of nice things. Too bad that I was not coming back because she really had a great time. She would like to do it again sometime if I wanted to. That it was unfair that she does not get to punish me for my poor quality camera pics. That the offer was still open if I would like to come back.

I am just kind of curious. As a pro domme is do you think she was trying to churn up more business or is it more than that?

Thank you in advance for your comments.

[Katmandu]

Kind of hard to guess what someone really means, being the recipient of a "he said, she said" conversation.

OK, that off, let me say that, in my opinion, after telling her about your nice 'vanilla' relationship, and the fact that you were simply 'curious' to begin with (hey, we ALL should try everything once in life, eh?), she should have respected your thoughts and feelings and let it go at that. Very unprofessional.

[Carmenica Diaz]

Not all dominatrix’s are instantly professional.

In fact, a few are normal women who become a part-time dominatrix to experience what they’ve fantasised about!

It works both ways, you know. Of course, the money is good but it’s also a way of keeping yourself a little distant from it.

It’s not that acceptable in today’s society for a woman to admit she enjoys punishing and controlling males and I know that family, friends and career would not understand.

Most attractive males are boringly vanilla – it’s rather difficult to find a life partner who enjoys being flogged occasionally by the little wife!

Back to the dominatrix – maybe she saw you as what she’d been looking for.

[Ruby]

That the offer was still open if I would like to come back.

I am just kind of curious. As a pro domme is do you think she was trying to churn up more business or is it more than that?

Thank you in advance for your comments.

Is the offer still open if you want to come back for FREE?

Like Kats said, we don't have all the details.

Perhaps she is chasing you, because you want to be caught? You e-mailed her saying you probably wouln't come back. Probably is not a real no.

You may want to make sure you are sending the right signals, so she can, too. What do you want to happen next?

[Shredmonster]

Is the offer still open if you want to come back for FREE?

Like Kats said, we don't have all the details.

Perhaps she is chasing you, because you want to be caught? You e-mailed her saying you probably wouln't come back. Probably is not a real no.

You may want to make sure you are sending the right signals, so she can, too. What do you want to happen next?

Nothing was mentioned about it being free. I mean this was in a professional dungoen. So I have to assume it would not be. If I were to do this over the course of time who knows what would happen.
Frankly, my head tells me to let it go and move on. And I most likely will.

I did not mean to be confusing to her but this was probably the most erotic experience of my life and I emailed her afterward to compliment her and let her know that. Hell there was no one else I could tell!
So yeah maybe you are right and I should not have emailed back at all - but she did request pictures of the marks.
She had asked me some questions during our session and did not quite believe some of my answers and I wanted to comfirm to her what I said was in fact true as long as I was sending the pics anyway. For example she did not know whether to believe whether I was nervous because it did not seem so. And yes I would be extremely drawn to her if I were to go back.

I probably opened my mouth up too much when I emailed her after our session and told her she was intelligent and pretty and that she was the type of person I could potentially quickly form an emotional bond with - and that this would not be good for my current relationship and that scared the hell out of me.
She said she was delighted with our session and the marks she made - at least the physical ones. The session was really intense and she told me she enjoyed our time together. I am not bragging when I say this - but I am just saying I have been with lots of women in the past - lots. Plus I am in sales. I have had a lot of experience reading people and my instincts tell me there was something there even though there was a money exchange.

I knew going in that I was taking a chance on something happening - not that is has - but there is always a remote chance - life is strange. Fortunately I have not built up an emotional bond at this time but you know how it is when you meet a new person for the first time and you can't stop thinking about them - especially when you have had an intense experience such as this.

I am alright as long as I don't go back. I know myself pretty well. If I went back I might be in trouble though. Then again maybe I am reading too much into all of this.

[Ruby]

I am alright as long as I don't go back. I know myself pretty well. If I went back I might be in trouble though. Then again maybe I am reading too much into all of this.

I don't think you are reading too much into this.
That intense thrill of those first satisfying experiences is nothing to take lightly. Let's face it, it can be addicting.

When I asked "if the offer was still open if you want to come back for FREE?", I thought that would help clarify whether she wants you back for her pleasure or profits.
It was a question to ask her if you thought perhaps you wanted to go back for more.

There are many things to think about...
Was this for your entertainment?
Education?
If your partner discovered this activity would it harm your relationship?
Why would you be in trouble if you went back?

You don't have to answer here, just things to think about.

[Shredmonster]

I don't think you are reading too much into this.
That intense thrill of those first satisfying experiences is nothing to take lightly. Let's face it, it can be addicting.

When I asked "if the offer was still open if you want to come back for FREE?", I thought that would help clarify whether she wants you back for her pleasure or profits.
It was a question to ask her if you thought perhaps you wanted to go back for more.

There are many things to think about...
Was this for your entertainment?
Education?
If your partner discovered this activity would it harm your relationship?
Why would you be in trouble if you went back?

You don't have to answer here, just things to think about.

This was a craving I have had for a long time to do this. Funny it was like air being let out of a balloon after it was over. Like I finally got my fantasy fullfilled.
And it would absolutetly destroy my current relationship.
And I think it would be trouble if I went back because I know I would be so drawn to her - not as a dom but more as a person. I can just tell when it comes to something like this.
And I did not assume it would be for free. After all it was a professional dungeon - 8 rooms and all. But even if I did go back and pay I would be afraid it could develop into something which would not be practical for my current living situation.
But my point of all of this is I was just curious - trying to see if my intincts are correct about it. I could be completely wrong here and just seeing it from one perspective so I thought I would get some ideas from some of the people here.
thanks

[Masters_lilone]

this is only my opinion... i think you should tell your partner about your intrest in the lifestyle.... is your partner totally vanilla that they think that our lifestyle is for sick perverts and they would have no part of it?.... from what i read it sounds to me like you want to see her again but are scared to. i have a few websites that i can give you the links to so you can have your partner read them if the case turns out to be that they are totally vanilla that may help to show them that there is nothing sick or perverted about our lifestyle.