I think u are on to something with the doormat thing- Many men I have dated have ended up doormats because they simply did not get the courage up to say "No!" "You will not have your way"- The ironic thing is that if they did, I would have respected them for it AND it would have been a complete turn on-I think it's a part of human nature to test boundaries- As far as the "vanilla" relationship thing- You are right...I can't even fantasize without adding some D/S play to my private thoughts- you know...being put in a completely subordinate position. I know this may sound strange but the D/S cyber play I and Amo have constructed LITERALLY left my hands shaking on the keyboard. Needless to say, the phone sex itself has been better THAN any sex I have EVER had= which leaves me wondering what will the real play be like- my head will probably explode mid-coitus!
By the way, I told my significant other that it's a good idea if he find his own place- the reaction- no big deal- He said, "I saw this coming and was wondering when you were gonna get to it." The good news is, he wasn't phased in the least-after a five minute talk- he feels that things have "fizzled" between us and thinks at least a separation is in oder- No objections from me! It was not as hard as I thought-Thank God this is my place and there are no financial ties...whew!!!