His reaction when I told him was surprisingly... I dunno. Short? He said he was sorry, and that we'd obviously gone too far, and that he said if he didn't hear from me in a month he'd assume I wanted to end the relationship. And that was that.
And that was it for aftercare? Oh my, now I'd be worried...or disappointed for that matter. He's basically leaving everything to yourself - where is he to help you get over this bad experience that he initiated? Granted, you could have set up more hard limits and have safeworded out - but both of you have to deal with the situation as it developed and the least I'd have expected of him would have been to support you, be there for you, talk this over thoroughly...and then talk about where and if you want to go with your relationship. Just my two cents.