Parents and children in DOM/sub role

[wingsofanangel]

I still think there is a similarity between the two.

People do what they have to do in a given situation. Yes I am a submissive... but if I were to ever have children I know I would have to step up to the plate so to speak and be everything my child would need... including in some situations to speak my dominance over them.. to put my foot down.

After all what is a dominant? Someone who guides... cherishes... loves.. protects... listens... helps... and so much more

What is a parent? ..... see the above ^^^


Strip the sex from the D/s aspect and I think it can be very comparible. Just as you have hardcore D/s situations and less extreme ends of a D/s relationship ... you have that as well in a parent/child situation. Some parents are more of the free spirited here are some choices pick one and I hope you do what is "right"... others set clear guidlines of what is expected of the child.

For me I guess... I don't see a clear distinction between the two...

[annie]

I still think there is a similarity between the two.

After all what is a dominant? Someone who guides... cherishes... loves.. protects... listens... helps... and so much more

What is a parent? ..... see the above ^^^

Thank you wings... I couldn't have said it better. And yes, that is what is a parent is... just as what a Dom is. And just as a dom has to punish at times so do I as a parent... that is the only way to help the growth process. And I am a firm believer in the "natural consequences" theory problem is some "natural consequences" happen so far down the road, and when a child is past the point of being a decent person that I do and will create and enforce those types of consequences now, while they are still young enough to learn from them.

[Isabelle90]

I am a firm believer in the "natural consequences" theory problem is some "natural consequences" happen so far down the road, and when a child is past the point of being a decent person that I do and will create and enforce those types of consequences now, while they are still young enough to learn from them.

Parenting 101: Just Annie

If only all parents would subscribe to this philosophy!!! You are offering your children a safe environment to make mistakes. An environment that won't be so kind for them as adults. I applaud you and others that follow this approach!

[TomStraye]

You are offering your children a safe environment to make mistakes.!

So you do get it! No offence but you had me worried for a while. What say we all meet up in, say, 25 years time and compare notes. Because, let's face it, on this one, the proof of the pudding is in the eating.

Better still, let's make that a date for 40 years hence for, by then, the power-boot will be on the other foot for most if not all of us — our children having the power to rule our lives and tell us what to do.

God I love Nature. She is the most elegant Domme that I know!

And, returning to the original post that started this whole thred, may I say that you are also right, indigo. There is no D/s dynamic to parenting beyond the thread of human nature that permeates all human interactions.

Any who think otherwise and see significant similarity between that which passes between consenting adults and that which passes between adult and child, need to unplug and get out more!

That or they need to go buy body armour, lest they be mistaken for would-be child molesters and abusers of innocents. Not that that would save them if they are of that sort. Where I come from, that's why we have lamp=posts, razor-wire and a river for garbage disposal.!

Agent provocateur sent into the community to manufacture evidence of wrong-doing, incidentally, get treated even more harshly.

[annie]

Any who think otherwise and see significant similarity between that which passes between consenting adults and that which passes between adult and child, need to unplug and get out more!

That or they need to go buy body armour, lest they be mistaken for would-be child molesters and abusers of innocents. Not that that would save them if they are of that sort. Where I come from, that's why we have lamp=posts, razor-wire and a river for garbage disposal.!

Agent provocateur sent into the community to manufacture evidence of wrong-doing, incidentally, get treated even more harshly.

There is nothing about molestation or abusing of children that is being considered. I am fairly certain that 99.99999% of us agree that both of those are WRONG in general but especially when dealing with children. As someone clearly stated, the thought behind their post was completely removing any sexual aspect what so ever. That seemed to be a clearly unspoken fact in the conversation up until the clarifying post, at least in my thinking.

What is being said, at least from my understanding and view point, is that raising a child is like a D/s relationship in the underlying values and the roles that some have to take on. As Wings pointed out... a Dom wants what is best for the sub, loves, nurtures, cares for, helps to grow, helps to guide, etc. That is what a parent does as well is it not? Do we not help our children learn. Yes, it may be through their own mistakes, but how many subs here have "learned" through their own mistakes, etc.

I agree the dynamic, based on the nature of the relationship alone is different. Hell, in my household the nature of the relationship is different per child, just as it is in most. And yes, the control will shift throughout the child's growth and development, but doesn't it also shift in a D/s relationship as the sub grows? The shift may not be in the same fashion but it is still there in both relationships.

I don't think anyone is saying children are subs. The thought is that, just as a Dominate has to have a certain amount of control to help the sub so does the parent and both relationships work on the same basic function. That is the way it is though for anyone who lives in this world. Be it with children/parents, bosses/employees, teachers/students, dominates/subs.... there is ALWAYS a leader and there is ALWAYS a follower... with the hope that some day the follower grows past needing the leadership (or that certain type of leadership) and in many cases hopefully surpasses the leader.

And on a side note... I do "unplug" and am very active in my children's lives. (Just ask Delia she listens about the latest happenings often enough...lol) But to be active also means that I have to take a Dominate role in many of the things we do, etc. or they wouldn't get to experience as much as they do and more importantly they wouldn't get to experience it in a safe environment. So, just because someone has a different view point doesn't mean that negative generalization of an entire thought process are necessary.