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  1. #1
    Transman
    Join Date
    May 2008
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    Boston-area, MA, USA
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    As a transsexual (not transgender, thank you) man (means I was born female, but am now living as male), I can't stress enough the importance of education. I appreciate the willingness to be an ally to your friend, but in order to be a better one, you should do a Google search on Trans 101 and learn about the language. Calling someone "a transgender" is actually pretty rude, like calling someone "a gay." And it certainly isn't women becoming men, and men becoming women. Not at all. Nor is it "trapped in the wrong body." This process does not involve a brain transplant :-P

    For me, because I can only use myself as an example, I was born female, and lived as female for quite a while. But I never was female. I was always male. Currently I am taking steps in my medical transition to alter my body to something I'm comfortable with. I've been injecting testosterone for almost two years (nothing special, it's just male puberty and menopause), been binding my chest for about three-ish years (no, it doesn't hurt my chest, but the binder does get uncomfortable after a while), and am in the process of a legal name change. I have zero interest in getting my genitals surgically altered, as I consider my junk to be male because it's mine and I'm male, so yeah. I do, however, plan on getting a double-mastectomy to remove breast tissue someday (it isn't any more painful than any other kind of surgery).

    I think my personal site is in my profile, and that covers my physical transition to date. So if you'd like to know more about my experience, you're welcome to check it out.
    I swear I'm a pretty awesome person!

  2. #2
    Banned
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    Jun 2008
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    NYC soon to be back to Florida!
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    Quote Originally Posted by zander8605 View Post
    As a transsexual (not transgender, thank you) man (means I was born female, but am now living as male), I can't stress enough the importance of education. I appreciate the willingness to be an ally to your friend, but in order to be a better one, you should do a Google search on Trans 101 and learn about the language. Calling someone "a transgender" is actually pretty rude, like calling someone "a gay." And it certainly isn't women becoming men, and men becoming women. Not at all. Nor is it "trapped in the wrong body." This process does not involve a brain transplant :-P

    For me, because I can only use myself as an example, I was born female, and lived as female for quite a while. But I never was female. I was always male. Currently I am taking steps in my medical transition to alter my body to something I'm comfortable with. I've been injecting testosterone for almost two years (nothing special, it's just male puberty and menopause), been binding my chest for about three-ish years (no, it doesn't hurt my chest, but the binder does get uncomfortable after a while), and am in the process of a legal name change. I have zero interest in getting my genitals surgically altered, as I consider my junk to be male because it's mine and I'm male, so yeah. I do, however, plan on getting a double-mastectomy to remove breast tissue someday (it isn't any more painful than any other kind of surgery).

    I think my personal site is in my profile, and that covers my physical transition to date. So if you'd like to know more about my experience, you're welcome to check it out.
    I apologize I never meant for it to be taken the wrong way. Thank you for teaching me, I just wanted to open peoples eyes to stuff like this and see what they thought. Like i said i apologize. Thank you

  3. #3
    non-toxic Ivy
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    Seattle, WA
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    It's heartening to see the positive attitudes towards transness around here.

    As zander says, it's best to be mindful of words and pronouns when talking about us trans people. With all the crap we have to deal with every day, just having friends who use the right terms around us can really mean a lot. In a nutshell, a transsexual should always be referred to as the gender they identify as, regardless of how many alterations they've made to their body and life yet. (It's never as simple as flicking a switch from one sex to the other, even if popular media likes to portray "sex change operations" that way.)
    I'm not even angry, I'm being so sincere right now
    Even though you broke my heart, and killed me
    And tore me to pieces
    And threw every piece into a fire
    As they burned, it hurt because
    I was so happy for you!

  4. #4
    Banned
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    Quote Originally Posted by gloombunny View Post
    It's heartening to see the positive attitudes towards transness around here.

    As zander says, it's best to be mindful of words and pronouns when talking about us trans people. With all the crap we have to deal with every day, just having friends who use the right terms around us can really mean a lot. In a nutshell, a transsexual should always be referred to as the gender they identify as, regardless of how many alterations they've made to their body and life yet. (It's never as simple as flicking a switch from one sex to the other, even if popular media likes to portray "sex change operations" that way.)
    as i said above, i apologize.

  5. #5
    Transman
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    May 2008
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    Quote Originally Posted by shayna View Post
    as i said above, i apologize.
    And as I told you before, it's called learning :-)

    It would be different if you were intentionally trying to offend anyone. But you weren't, so it isn't the end of the world. This isn't a topic covered in any form of school, the world in general doesn't like to acknowledge that gender is a spectrum. You slipped up on terminology and pronouns - you're not the first! So now you know for next time :-)
    I swear I'm a pretty awesome person!

  6. #6
    Registered User
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    Quote Originally Posted by gloombunny View Post
    It's heartening to see the positive attitudes towards transness around here.

    As zander says, it's best to be mindful of words and pronouns when talking about us trans people. With all the crap we have to deal with every day, just having friends who use the right terms around us can really mean a lot. In a nutshell, a transsexual should always be referred to as the gender they identify as, regardless of how many alterations they've made to their body and life yet. (It's never as simple as flicking a switch from one sex to the other, even if popular media likes to portray "sex change operations" that way.)
    they kind of have to gloombunny. For the general public, it would be hard for them to really understand the diversness of the transgender/transexual. So they keep it simple and binary.

    bt iam glaadthis topic was started. I myself identify as female. But what does that mean to me? Well it means to me that being who i am is that it involves time and a gradual step by step learning and acceptance processes.
    i just still present as a borderline androgynous male. but that doesn't mean that i will and always be that way on the inside. It is just a process that i feel comfortable with now. later, as i can have the money and resources to transition fashionably and sexually (altar my physical sex) then i will present as more feminine.

    my stance on may parts and what it means to me to exxpereience them is universal. it changes everyday, my outlook on what kind of sexual anatomy i have. some days some sensation i will experience and i'll feel that having a full operation to have a vagina is what i would want. but then when i dont have those experiences, I am satisfied with my penis, but with no desire to have my testicles. so it goes hand in hand with who i am asa female identified person. and understanding other sexualities is what helps me through my sexual identity, not only my orientation, by my identification with my gender and sexual anatomy.
    "You got preheat the oven before you can stick in the turkey"

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